We make judgments about people all the time, and they are usually not helpful. “That jerk just cut me off on the freeway!” “That girl is rude.” “That guy is an ignorant fool.” We make our judgments based on rudimentary perceptions and limited experience.

Life experience has taught many of us to be careful about making judgments. We have learned, usually the hard way, that making judgments and having expectations usually leads to disappointment at best. Our judgments close our hearts, and our expectations put limitations on an otherwise limitless future.

But sometimes you Know that something, or someone, is not good for you. Your gut tells you. Your instincts tell you. Your angels whisper in your ear. You can feel it in your heart that this thing, this situation, this relationship – is not right for you. Should you toss away this feeling, this Knowing, because it is a “judgment?” Should you feel guilt for having such seemingly judgmental feelings? No. To do so would be to ignore your powers of Discernment, and to make meaningless the Gift of Free Choice.

Discernment is a skill of Wisdom. To discern the Truth from the Lie, the Right from the Wrong, the Good from the Bad – this, if it is not done from a place of fear, is discernment. Fear is the underpinning of Judgment, as it is the underpinning of all Separation. Discernment is a gift that goes along with the Free Choice we all have. We get to decide what is right for us.

Discernment is how we shape our adult values. As children, we are fed whatever values our parents held. As grown-ups, we discern what is Truth for us, and we create our own values. I make my decisions based on my values. I value health, joy, free creativity, faith and love. So I make decisions based on this. And when I encounter people who choose illness, complaining, victimhood, pessimism and fear, I stay away from them. Does this make me judgmental? No. I’m using my discernment to see what is Right for me. Does that mean I hate this person? No. In fact, if I’m in touch with my True Self, I love this person. I just don’t want to be involved in their drama. I wish only for them what is in their Highest Good – whatever that may be. And I accept that it may be in that person’s Highest Good to stay in pain for a while to learn some lesson. I think the AA term for it is that they are “doing their research.” But that doesn’t need to include me. I am detached, although I am never completely separated, as we all share the same web.

Freedom vs. Interconnectedness

We are all One. That seems to be an acceptable statement for most people who are reading this. We are all part of the great Oneness. We are interconnected in myriad of ways that we can scarcely understand. We are all God/Goddess/Divine – especially when we are combined.

We are all parts, reflections, pieces of the grand puzzle. But it is the puzzle that is perfect and whole, not the parts. The entire Earth, with her sufferings and her triumphs is perfect in its purpose, not in its details. Would you look at a murder scene and say “Ah – now this is divine.” Probably not. But would the mother of the murder victim look at her next newborn baby and see even more beauty in the infant? Perhaps. And if you take all the murders and the deaths and the births and the rebirths and join them all – perhaps that would be the perfection – the Great Wisdom of birth and death revealed.

As pieces of the great puzzle, every action a single person takes affects the whole. We each have freedom to do as we choose. Some take action with no regard to the whole, or even to the other people around them. Some act only in their own regard. There are always effects, whether they are intended or not. We are so interconnected.

Those who are conscious of this interconnectedness, who value the enjoyment of life for all, generally try to make decisions that will benefit the Whole. Those who live in fear generally couldn’t care less about interconnectedness, because they’re mostly reacting defensively to their life, and clinging to their perception of independence and separation. But there is no separation. We are all one. And the one affects the whole. Our Freedom is seen by some as an invective to act in a singular way, separated from the greater web. On the surface, it looks like we are freeing ourselves, by releasing ourselves from those weighty connections to the All That Is – allowing ourselves free reign to do what we think will give us pleasure and insight. But the separation usually brings us back to a feeling of emptiness, cut off from the web and the connections.

Integrity

Walking the path with Good Intent for All That Is is the path of Integrity. It brings peace not only to the walker, but to all that surrounds her. It is not the requirement of a religion. It is not the dogma taught as to a child. It is not a restriction on freedom. It is simply the strong recommendation of a Universe that cares about each insignificant human light that walks the Earth and elsewhere. Discernment is the proper use of Freedom to Choose actions that benefit All That Is. This is the substance of Integrity - our birthright, our privilege, and our joy.

 

 ***********************